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Joined: 2/27/2011
Posts: 353
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I recently taught a class on High Concept at the Dallas Fort Worth Writers Conference, and one of the exercises I had the session attendees do was to write down their one-sentence hook and read it aloud to the rest of group. I listened and tried to explain why their hook was - or wasn't - high concept.
It was fascinating to see the audience reaction when the individual writers read their hooks aloud. I could see simply by the collective body language of the listeners whether or not the writer had hit home with his or her hook.
I thought it would be fun to try the same thing here! Post your one-sentence hook, and in the coming days, Danielle and I will go through and let you know whether we think your hook is high concept or not. In the meantime, I'd also love to see other writers chime in and let us know what they think of their fellow writers' hooks.
Ready? GO!
Cheers!
Colleen
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Colleen Lindsay
Book Country Community Manager
colleen@bookcountry.com
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Joined: 3/3/2011
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Okay, lets try this again. First time got an error.
I missed the high concept class, so I am still not sure if this new revision is right.
The truth in fairy tales becomes too real for sixteen year old Emily Lee when an axe wielding pig tries to chop off her head.
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Joined: 2/27/2011
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Kirk - this is better than the first one you showed me in Dallas but I'm not sure I'd call it high concept, to be honest. Since I know what your book is about, I'm also not sure this is even giving readers the best glimpse inside your story.
I am also a little worried that although you indicated to me that this was a book for adults (even though it features a young protagonist), this hook makes it sound like you're writing a YA novel, which might be giving the wrong impression to potential agen
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Joined: 3/3/2011
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Colleen, I appreciate the response but I'm still a bit confused on the difference between 'high concept' and 'hook'. From all that I read the first line of a query is supposed to hook the agent into wanting to read more. Is there a difference or am I just not understanding the true intention of this first line to the query? Man I wish I was able to attend that class.
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Joined: 3/3/2011
Posts: 68
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In a city built among the bones of a titan, an aging superhero leads his team against a group of infighting tyrants: a gangster, a madman, a slaver, a sorcerer and a sentient automaton.
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When the daughter of the Iron Samurai inherits his duties after he is slain, she must decide between avenging his murder and saving the world through the life of a child.
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Joined: 3/4/2011
Posts: 58
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Dick Van Dyke meets the girl next door on an interstellar starship cruise.
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Joined: 3/7/2011
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@Michael: Even though I don't read a lot of superhero fiction, I like this idea! It sounds like you have a lot to work with in this story (and I mean that in a good way!).
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Rose learns her aunt May helps watch over a magic wood filled with song, ghosts, and denizens light and dark. Rose learns to love the wood, but can she save her niece from a hunter's trap?
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Joined: 3/3/2011
Posts: 21
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An OCD former special forces soldier discovers the chaos surrounding us every day is not just random chance, but a set of orchestrated events.
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Joined: 3/10/2011
Posts: 11
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When a group of four reincarnation addicts head back down to Earth for another bout of life, only one of them remembers their past lives, sending her into a frantic, three-life journey to find out why her friends forgot.
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Joined: 2/27/2011
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All right, from the story I have posted here:
Hook: Flying men, lasers, international intrigue and what happens when a mad scientist falls in love with a spymaster in Victorian England.
High concept (?): Alternative historical romance for fans of James Bond.
Do your worst, Colleen and Danielle 
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Joined: 3/13/2011
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Truthfully, I have never taken a stab at this, so I'm definitely curious. This isn't for the piece I have up, but rather a different work in progress.
This is my line:
When Lars is thrust into the world of intrigue, he learns the one truth: there were few things more dangerous than the word of a Lord.
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Joined: 3/13/2011
Posts: 244
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For my contemporary fantasy, When the Star Fell:
Into each hero's life, a star must fall. This time the hero is Derek. Life is going great for him: Air Force, NASA, then the star falls. Now Derek learns that everything he knows about angels isn't entirely true.
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Joined: 3/14/2011
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For thousands of years, the human race has asked why, if there is a compassionate deity who created the universe, are we born to suffer and die. Ded Speaks, a spiritual warrior, sworn to protect and defend the holy relics and rituals of all the worlds faiths, is tracking an assassin who is targeting the leaders and relics of all organized religions, finally discovers the horrible answer that has eluded our species for so long and the fate of all existence and the universe itself rests on the terrible choice he must finally make.
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Joined: 3/12/2011
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Hmm. I don't know if this is high concept or not, but this is the logline I came up for my completed MS a while ago. On another board, it was either loved or loathed.
ATF Special Agent Alexandra MacPherson can't decide which is worse -- a witness who dies or a suspect who won't stay dead.
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Joined: 3/14/2011
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Writing the book was easier than writing this sentence, but here's a try:
No one understood the affair between the spoiled heiress and her stingy trust officer, but when she was killed and he disappeared, everyone they knew had something to say, some of it even true; and something to do – lead a demonstration, find a new love, or even go on a murder mystery weekend getaway for mature singles.
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Joined: 3/16/2011
Posts: 214
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(Contemporary romance/humor):
Sabrina swore off marriage and family so she could be groomed to run for public office, but when a dark horse candidate emerges to win her heart, she may have to rethink her choices if she wants to keep him.
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Joined: 3/17/2011
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Michael I loved the titan bit! I would so totally read that. I gave some thumbs up on the ones I liked. Mine is a bit more than one sentence. *hides from Colleen*
Amelia lives in the perfect world, no crime, no disease, and perfectly predictable days. Then on her 16th birthday she meets Alfred a new boy who isn't like the other boys in town. Interacting with Alfred Amelia learns that her life is scripted.. literally. She is an AI in a computer game and Alfred is the Game Maker, her maker. Can she find a way to break free into the real world before the game is over?
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Joined: 3/12/2011
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I've got a few different projects, I'm wondering if *any* of them are 'high concept' hooks. Here goes:
"A warrior monk recruits an assassin to protect his world from high tech pirates. Meanwhile he is contacted by aliens who are fleeing an ancient enemy." (Sci-Fi Action / Adventure)
"An ancient conspiracy of evil is preparing to destroy the world. Three high school seniors are all that stands in the way of Ragnarok." (Contemporary Fantasy Action / Adventure) (this one's a posted project, btw)
"The Mechanical Men of Kaiser Otto II and his Triple Alliance have nearly destroyed the Entente. All that stands in his way are three engineers. One is an ingenue. One is a cripple. One is dead." (SteamPunk Military Fiction)
and my current WIP
"A were stripper, an adjunct math professor and a wetware engineer are two worlds' only hope against a legion of demons from a parasite dimension." (Urban SciFi / Fantasy)
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Joined: 3/7/2011
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I know mine is not and needs work. Part of the reason I'm here.
WORLD LINES:
Anthropologist Kate Reilly's life takes an unexpected turn when time-traveling CPA agent Craig Williams chases a suspect into her museum, thrusting Kate into a world where past, present and future are connected, turning her understanding of history upside-down, while trying to prevent a conspiracy to unravel the existing world lines.
My problem has been describing my story in one sentence.
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Joined: 2/27/2011
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Okay, the honest truth is that not one of the loglines or hooks posted on the past few pages is actually high concept.
High concept is a big, very commercial idea that is easily explained in a few words. Think about those books that scream "THIS SHOULD BE A MOVIE!" The premise should be unique and have mass commercial appeal.
Some examples:
--> Unsinkable ship meets unmovable iceberg. (Titantic)
--> Romeo & Juliet. With vampires. (Twilight)
--> Scientist clones dinosaurs and uses them as an attraction in an amusement park. (Jurassic Park)
The thing to remember is that not all books are going to be high concept. Not all books HAVE to be high concept.
AND THAT"S OKAY. =)
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Joined: 3/16/2011
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I would have loved to attend your "high concept" seminar.
I don't suppose that a webinar might be forthcoming --???
As for myself, I'd be happy if i had a "Made for Lifetime Television" concept!
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Joined: 3/12/2011
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@Colleen - How do you determine if something has commercial viability?
I definitely think I need to learn how to do pitches & high concept ideas. I wind up too convoluted, methinks. Then again, I'm not sure any of my ideas *are* high concept, no matter how much I'd love to see them as movies. 
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Joined: 3/14/2011
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Breaking down a complicated novel idea into a high concept hook sounds like trying to explain Shakespeare to preschoolers with two colors of play-doh.
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Joined: 3/13/2011
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Thanks, Colleen!
Your examples of high concept actually help understand just what it is. There are very few people who can adequately explain what it is.
With your examples, I'm pretty sure my books aren't high concept.
Deity-eating demons kill mankind! That sounds like a good alien flick though...
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Joined: 3/14/2011
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Second try at high concept--
Searching for true love. Backdrop: murder and embezzlement.
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Joined: 3/16/2011
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The Salem Witch Trials- they didn't even get one right! What the government doesn't want you to know about witchcraft.
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Joined: 2/28/2011
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The Resurrectionist:
After murder cases are solved, Dani Wright brings the victims back to life and sends the killer in their place.
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Joined: 3/7/2011
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I'm working on it. Hopefully, even if it's still not high concept, this one is a lot better.
Kate's having one of those days: kidnapped, almost murdered, forced on the run with a time traveling agent who's attempting to stop a plot to remake history.
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Joined: 3/12/2011
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fHmm... Wonder if this is better...
"Demons try to destroy the world through virtual reality video games."
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Joined: 3/17/2011
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Trying again:
Girl meets boy, girl destroys boy. There are no rules inside the game, not even for The Game Maker.
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Joined: 3/31/2011
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I think Robert C Roman's on Demons destroying the world through virtual reality video games sounds more high concept, if not totally my taste (sorry, Robert).
I really liked the way @KatSheridanKupanoff's book sounded about the 4 reincarnation kids (addicts? adults? already I can't remember exactly but still I thought it was a cool idea) who come back but only 1 remembers the past lives.
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Joined: 3/30/2011
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Ophelia knows the cards don't lie, but they never warned her that she would be kidnapped by the delicious Boone and embroiled in in a civil war she wants no part of.
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Joined: 3/12/2011
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@Michelle - Thanks! I understand completely if it's not your thing. I'm working on getting the idea I've got transmitted quickly via the high-concept hook, and knowing I'm making progress helps.
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Joined: 4/3/2011
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They say it takes a village to raise a child, unfortunately Thomas Emerson Walling has the whole village in his head and they all want to lend a hand.
My Four Fathers & Eleanor
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Joined: 4/3/2011
Posts: 66
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Author Sinnie Ellis never knew hating her best selling novel main character and her self absorbed husband could be the key to true happiness.
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Joined: 4/3/2011
Posts: 66
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The reincarnated desciples of Christ are about to meet their maker all over again, can Detective Casey Lattimer stop him before the end of days?
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Joined: 4/3/2011
Posts: 66
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One night a carnival appears in a field outside of fifteen-year old Lilly May Johnson’s small town and with it a boy and an adventure unlike anything she could ever imagine.
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Joined: 4/3/2011
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Talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time…
The first is from Earth’s past and followed a light into the desert seeing something he shouldn’t have.
The second is from Earth’s present and finds something he’s not supposed to.
The third is from Earth’s future and she will witness the end of mankind with the fourth.
The fourth is from the stars and was seen when he shouldn’t have been, discovered somewhere he shouldn’t be, inadvertently bringing with him the end of the world.
All four of them will come together to save the planet for rest of us.
Sorry about spamming but I have a lot of novels completed and apparently no ability to write a hook thus far.
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Joined: 3/12/2011
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@Sinnie - I think some of those may be a little... in? I think that was the term I heard used once to describe a TV series that was incredibly cool for those who were watching it, but incredibly hard to pick up for those who weren't.
My point here is that what you need for a hook isn't what you know to be cool about your story, but what an outsider who has never even heard you speak would think is cool about your story. Those sound like things a reviewer would say, or maybe a back cover blurb.
@Taylor - does a hook have to be high concept to be an effective hook?
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Joined: 3/13/2011
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Sinnie, for the last one.
Three humans, one from our past, one from now, and one from our future, meet a man from the stars, who brings with him the end of all humanity, unless the four can work together to stop it.
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Joined: 3/12/2011
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@Taylor - Huh. I was given some advice a while back to avoid that kind of comparison in my pitch / hook. It sounds almost like you're saying that rule is inverted for 'High Concept'. Lemme try...
"The Conan Saga, retold as a dystopian Space Opera, with the genders switched"
"Sailor Moon meets American Gods"
"A mage who is a CSI in his day job opens Pandora's Box by defeating a serial killer in a mage duel"
"A terrible accident leaves a class of school children is lost in unexplored space with no way home" (My first try at YA)
"World War One, fought by Mechanical Men designed by Mad Scientists - OR - Evangelion gone SteamPunk" (because SteamPunk simply MUST be titled like an old Rocky & Bullwinkle radio play)
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Joined: 4/3/2011
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Mr. Hollins,
Fabulous job on turning my entire query into one hook. I feel rather daft now and you have blown me away. I was trying to word it with some length for the query. =P Thank you. =)
I find it difficult to get this whole thing down. It has taken a little while for me to get down this hook deal down to what I have, that it where the noob bit of my writing comes in.
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Joined: 4/3/2011
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Isn't is dangerous to compare your writing to someone else's?
What do you do if you can't pull off a comparrison? I can't on three of mine.
Maybe it's my lack of attention to today's media but I can't find something to say this is "So and so meets so and so." It's doesn't work.
Is this where a reviewer comes in?
@Sinnie - I think some of those may be a little... in? I think that was the term I heard used once to describe a TV series that was incredibly cool for those who were watching it, but incredibly hard to pick up for those who weren't.
I do not understand what you are saying, "a little...in?"
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Joined: 3/13/2011
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Your welcome! Again, a case of, I can describe other's stuff better than my own. sigh.
By "in" they mean, an "in" crowd, or an "in" joke, it makes no sense to you unless you already are familiar with it.
Robert
"Sailor Moon meets American Gods"
I need to hurt you now.....
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Joined: 3/30/2011
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Paranormal steampunk My Fair Lady with murder.
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Joined: 3/12/2011
Posts: 376
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@Alex - yeah, that's about the size of 'in'. also, why would you want to hurt me for that one?
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Joined: 3/13/2011
Posts: 412
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because the concept hurts my brain. A lot.
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Joined: 3/30/2011
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@Robert and Alex It hurts my brain as well! But d*mn if I wouldn't pick it up just to see what it was like. XD
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